1 00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:16,480 So many times I've had uh writers come 2 00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:17,760 up to me at book events and book 3 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:19,680 signings. 4 00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:21,279 I have a book that I want to write. I 5 00:00:21,279 --> 00:00:23,199 just can't get started, you know. And 6 00:00:23,199 --> 00:00:24,800 the reason they can't get started is 7 00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:27,039 they're trying to figure out everything 8 00:00:27,039 --> 00:00:29,519 that's going to be in this 140,000word 9 00:00:29,519 --> 00:00:31,920 500page novel before sit down to write 10 00:00:31,920 --> 00:00:33,520 it. And they're totally overwhelmed by 11 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:35,680 it. They just can't do it. And they're 12 00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:37,760 their their fingers hover over the keys. 13 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:39,200 Their, you know, their hand is shaking 14 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:40,879 with a pen. So they never write the 15 00:00:40,879 --> 00:00:42,879 first page. I always like to come up 16 00:00:42,879 --> 00:00:44,719 with I call it the big pop. And the big 17 00:00:44,719 --> 00:00:47,280 pop is how is the novel gonna open? you 18 00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:49,360 know, because if you don't get that 19 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:51,280 right, it doesn't matter what else you 20 00:00:51,280 --> 00:00:52,640 write after that because nobody's going 21 00:00:52,640 --> 00:00:54,320 to bother to finish reading it. So, the 22 00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:56,559 big pop is really important. So, I need 23 00:00:56,559 --> 00:00:59,359 to understand intimately how that scene 24 00:00:59,359 --> 00:01:00,960 is going to unfold and how it's going to 25 00:01:00,960 --> 00:01:04,000 drive the rest of the story. Um, so it 26 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:07,119 could be that, you know, somebody dies, 27 00:01:07,119 --> 00:01:10,080 somebody is killed, a plane crashes, you 28 00:01:10,080 --> 00:01:12,320 know, um a government facility is 29 00:01:12,320 --> 00:01:15,040 robbed, uh somebody escapes from a 30 00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:17,439 prison. Uh, that's the big pop. And then 31 00:01:17,439 --> 00:01:19,360 it's my job to take that big pop and 32 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:21,360 break it down, understand how I'm going 33 00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:22,960 to construct that scene, how you will 34 00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:24,880 construct that scene. There was a a book 35 00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:27,119 I wrote called The Escape where this guy 36 00:01:27,119 --> 00:01:28,560 that I needed to get out of that prison. 37 00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:30,960 It's USDB, United States Disciplinary 38 00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:32,640 Barracks at Levvenworth. It's escape 39 00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:34,240 proof. Nobody's ever escaped from it. 40 00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:37,040 You just can't escape from it. I My job 41 00:01:37,040 --> 00:01:38,880 was in the opening chapters, I needed 42 00:01:38,880 --> 00:01:40,960 him to escape from this prison. I've 43 00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:42,240 been out there. I mean, I've see how 44 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:44,000 it's worked out. It's a military prison. 45 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:45,759 And for me, in my mind, there was only 46 00:01:45,759 --> 00:01:47,920 way one way for this to happen, and that 47 00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:50,159 was the big pop that I came up with. So 48 00:01:50,159 --> 00:01:51,439 everything that I built around that 49 00:01:51,439 --> 00:01:54,000 opening scene and my outline, I needed 50 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,320 to execute on. But all the different 51 00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:58,479 elements I built in that scene, all of 52 00:01:58,479 --> 00:01:59,840 that was threaded into the rest of the 53 00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:01,920 novel. I got the big pop. It's almost 54 00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:03,840 like a little self-enccapsized short 55 00:02:03,840 --> 00:02:05,680 story. I'm going to sit down and I'm 56 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:07,840 going to write those first few chapters. 57 00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:09,119 And then all of a sudden, you're over 58 00:02:09,119 --> 00:02:10,959 that hump of, oh my god, how do I do 59 00:02:10,959 --> 00:02:12,080 this? Because when you write those first 60 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:13,520 few chapters, all of a sudden you opened 61 00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:15,280 up all these possibilities for all these 62 00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:16,720 other plot threats. I've got this stuff 63 00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,160 here. He's escaped from the prison. Who 64 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:19,599 helped him? Who didn't help him? Why did 65 00:02:19,599 --> 00:02:21,040 he get out? What's he going to do now? 66 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:23,280 And all of a sudden there's all this 67 00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:25,280 stuff you can write about. And the and 68 00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:27,120 the problem of I don't know how to start 69 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:31,800 it goes away. 70 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:37,920 While I'm writing a novel, I constantly 71 00:02:37,920 --> 00:02:39,840 go back to the first chapter. Sometimes 72 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:41,760 every time that I go back to the novel, 73 00:02:41,760 --> 00:02:42,959 I could be in the middle or neither end 74 00:02:42,959 --> 00:02:44,480 and I go back to that first chapter. 75 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:45,920 That's my touchstone. That should be a 76 00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:47,280 writer's touchdown. That's how you 77 00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:49,680 opened this compelling story to the 78 00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:51,680 world. So, it's the most the first thing 79 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:53,680 that readers will see. In some ways, 80 00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:55,519 it's the most impressionable they will 81 00:02:55,519 --> 00:02:56,720 be because they're just getting 82 00:02:56,720 --> 00:02:58,160 introduced to the work you're trying to 83 00:02:58,160 --> 00:02:59,519 tell them, the story you're trying to 84 00:02:59,519 --> 00:03:01,599 lay out for them. It's I can't think of 85 00:03:01,599 --> 00:03:03,200 a more important chapter than the first 86 00:03:03,200 --> 00:03:04,640 chapter. some ways is more important 87 00:03:04,640 --> 00:03:06,159 than the last chapter of a book because 88 00:03:06,159 --> 00:03:08,800 this is the only shot you have to get it 89 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:11,519 right for the first time. So I 90 00:03:11,519 --> 00:03:13,280 constantly go back to that chapter one. 91 00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:15,280 I want to have it pristine and perfect 92 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:17,440 in every way but also because I need to 93 00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:20,000 make sure that every element in that 94 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,159 chapter is there for a reason because 95 00:03:22,159 --> 00:03:23,840 all the threads coming out from their 96 00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:25,760 first chapter permeate the rest of the 97 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:27,840 novel. So if I got something wrong here, 98 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:29,760 I've got something wrong here. That's 99 00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:31,680 why I constantly go back to that. That's 100 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:33,760 like the mother ship. You know, if you 101 00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:34,879 don't go back to the mother ship 102 00:03:34,879 --> 00:03:36,400 constantly, then you don't know what the 103 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:37,599 rest of the fleet is really doing and 104 00:03:37,599 --> 00:03:39,120 even it's actually going to make sense 105 00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:41,040 at the end. So, that should be your 106 00:03:41,040 --> 00:03:45,319 touchstone. It always is for me. 107 00:03:48,720 --> 00:03:50,560 And my earlier books, my chapters are 108 00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:51,920 really long. You know, I could have 109 00:03:51,920 --> 00:03:55,519 chapters were 15, 20 pages long. Um, and 110 00:03:55,519 --> 00:03:57,040 there's nothing wrong with that. I love 111 00:03:57,040 --> 00:03:59,439 I love long chapters and I love 112 00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:01,760 beautifully long constructed sentences. 113 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:03,680 Um, but there's lots of different ways 114 00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:06,400 to tell a story. And the thriller genre 115 00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:09,040 is such that there's this sense of 116 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:12,560 momentum and this sense of hurry up 117 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:13,920 because we got to get to something 118 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:16,239 monumental. The short chapters are like 119 00:04:16,239 --> 00:04:19,199 punches, rapid punches in the face. Um, 120 00:04:19,199 --> 00:04:21,120 it doesn't have to be all about action 121 00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:22,960 and somebody getting killed or bombs 122 00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:24,560 going off. It could just be conveying 123 00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:26,639 information, but it's like that. It's 124 00:04:26,639 --> 00:04:30,160 like that uh rapidity of motion where 125 00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:32,400 people get into this rhythm of, okay, 126 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:34,400 you know, I understand this is really 127 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:36,080 rocking and rolling, and there's short 128 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:37,440 bursts of stuff. I've got to pay 129 00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:39,440 attention. I'm on for this ride. I don't 130 00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:41,360 have to drift through 15 or 20 pages of 131 00:04:41,360 --> 00:04:44,400 stuff. Um, and you have to be really 132 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:45,840 disciplined in order to construct a 133 00:04:45,840 --> 00:04:48,479 novel that way because again, this even 134 00:04:48,479 --> 00:04:49,919 heightens the importance of each 135 00:04:49,919 --> 00:04:52,240 chapter. Um, I can make a chapter that's 136 00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:55,120 20 pages long and I can fudge along the 137 00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:56,560 way. I've got so many words that I can 138 00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:58,320 play around with. I can hide weaknesses. 139 00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:00,320 I can dillydally. I can, you know, go 140 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:02,320 off on tangents of stuff. But when 141 00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:03,759 you've got a chapter that's two, three, 142 00:05:03,759 --> 00:05:05,360 four pages long, you have to hit your 143 00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:08,160 mark with every word. There's no room to 144 00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:09,840 fudge. There's no room for weaknesses. 145 00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:14,039 You have to get there and get out. 146 00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:20,400 when I'm going through and looking at 147 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:22,639 the pacing of a novel or story that I've 148 00:05:22,639 --> 00:05:25,120 written, um, and I look within the 149 00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:26,720 content of a chapter, let's say a sample 150 00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:28,639 chapter, 151 00:05:28,639 --> 00:05:30,320 I look at the diversity of how I'm I'm 152 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:31,840 telling a story depending on the tools 153 00:05:31,840 --> 00:05:34,080 that I have. So if I have a chapter 154 00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:36,720 that's could very well be all narrative, 155 00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:39,120 all expository material where I'm moving 156 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:41,280 one person from A to B or it's an 157 00:05:41,280 --> 00:05:42,880 interior monologue of Amos Decker so 158 00:05:42,880 --> 00:05:44,160 he's thinking things through which he 159 00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:46,000 does a lot or Will Broby as he's 160 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:48,720 planning a hit. There may be no dialogue 161 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:50,800 in that chapter at all. It might just be 162 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:53,120 all narrative plus an interior monologue 163 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:54,800 where you see his thought process. And 164 00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:56,000 there's nothing wrong with that. It's 165 00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:58,639 not like every chapter has to have 166 00:05:58,639 --> 00:06:00,720 exposition, interior monologue, a 167 00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:02,400 narrative drive, and dialogue. There's 168 00:06:02,400 --> 00:06:04,400 no rule that says you you make the 169 00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:05,840 rules. You're the writer, so you make 170 00:06:05,840 --> 00:06:07,199 your own rules about how you want to 171 00:06:07,199 --> 00:06:10,080 construct a chapter or a story. But I 172 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:11,919 will try to look at some semblance of 173 00:06:11,919 --> 00:06:14,560 balance in there, too. If I've gotten if 174 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:16,319 I got three or four chapters in a row 175 00:06:16,319 --> 00:06:18,080 that's all just narrative, it's all just 176 00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:20,479 expository or one chapter that's all 177 00:06:20,479 --> 00:06:22,160 interior monologue. I'm in this guy's 178 00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:24,160 head the whole time, then I might be a 179 00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:25,520 little bit out of out of balance. And 180 00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:27,440 then I think about should I bring 181 00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:29,680 another element in? Should I have at the 182 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,520 end of this, should I have a him have a 183 00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:33,120 conversation with someone so some of the 184 00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:34,720 dialogue can bleed through into that 185 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:37,039 scene so it's not just always being in 186 00:06:37,039 --> 00:06:39,120 Decker's head in that entire chapter or 187 00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:40,960 a chapter where it's all I'm just trying 188 00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:43,280 to get a person from A to B. Well, in 189 00:06:43,280 --> 00:06:44,479 the middle of that scene, maybe they 190 00:06:44,479 --> 00:06:45,919 stop somewhere and they talk to 191 00:06:45,919 --> 00:06:48,160 somebody. So, it just breaks it up. 192 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:49,840 Sometimes you look at a chapter visually 193 00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:52,800 and it's just is it's all one element of 194 00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:54,800 a storytelling and it could be a little 195 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,240 daunting and it might, you know, a 196 00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:57,600 little bit of the energy for the reader, 197 00:06:57,600 --> 00:06:59,120 not just the writer, but the reader goes 198 00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:00,319 away and dissipates a little bit. 199 00:07:00,319 --> 00:07:02,240 They're like, "Oh, this is got to slog 200 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:04,319 through this, you know. Um, I just had a 201 00:07:04,319 --> 00:07:05,680 great dialogue scene this previous 202 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:07,520 chapter and now it's just blah. It's 203 00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:09,120 there's no more dialogue." So, really, 204 00:07:09,120 --> 00:07:10,960 you have to see what comes before and 205 00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:13,520 see what comes after. I try to in each 206 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:15,440 chapter unless the story calls for me to 207 00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:18,000 do another way blend in various elements 208 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:19,360 of storytelling to give it a little bit 209 00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:21,599 of variety and diversity to break it up 210 00:07:21,599 --> 00:07:23,120 uh not just for the story but also for 211 00:07:23,120 --> 00:07:26,680 the sake of the reader. 212 00:07:30,319 --> 00:07:32,560 So in the innocent there's a scene I 213 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,520 think it's chapter 14 uh which I outline 214 00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:37,680 and then I'm going to read from the the 215 00:07:37,680 --> 00:07:40,639 published pages um of that outline. So, 216 00:07:40,639 --> 00:07:42,479 in the outline, I call it the bus scene. 217 00:07:42,479 --> 00:07:45,039 And Will Roby is on this bus with a 218 00:07:45,039 --> 00:07:48,400 14-year-old teenager, Julie Getty. And 219 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:50,720 there's another guy on the bus who Roby 220 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:52,800 in my outline, I had bullet points. 221 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:56,960 Julie Getty, pepper spray, hit man, bus 222 00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:58,960 explodes. So, it was like five or six 223 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,199 bullet points that I had in my outline. 224 00:08:01,199 --> 00:08:03,440 And this, what I'm going to read to you 225 00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:06,160 is the result of the outline that I had. 226 00:08:06,160 --> 00:08:08,479 Professional killers were a unique lot. 227 00:08:08,479 --> 00:08:10,240 Roby thought this as the bus motored 228 00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:12,160 along. The vehicle suspension was for 229 00:08:12,160 --> 00:08:14,800 [ __ ] and the ride was too. They have to 230 00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:16,800 endure 200 miles of this, but Roby was 231 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,400 not focused on that. He stared through 232 00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:20,000 the gap in the seat, watching and 233 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,080 waiting. When you were on a mission, you 234 00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:23,360 look for things that other people would 235 00:08:23,360 --> 00:08:25,120 never focus on, like entry and exit 236 00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:26,720 points. Always have at least two of 237 00:08:26,720 --> 00:08:29,120 each. Gunight angles, positions from 238 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,120 which others can strike back at you, 239 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:33,200 sizing up opponents without seemingly to 240 00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:35,440 do so. Trying to fair it out intent by 241 00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:37,919 reading body cues alone. Never let 242 00:08:37,919 --> 00:08:41,519 anyone notice you noticing him. Roby was 243 00:08:41,519 --> 00:08:43,120 undertaking all of these tasks right now 244 00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:44,800 and it was totally unconnected with his 245 00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:47,760 plate. He had people after him clearly, 246 00:08:47,760 --> 00:08:49,760 but just as clearly the girl had someone 247 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:52,080 after her. And Roby now knew that he was 248 00:08:52,080 --> 00:08:53,920 not the only professional killer on 249 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:56,160 board this bus tonight. He was looking 250 00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,399 right now at the second one. He slipped 251 00:08:58,399 --> 00:09:01,040 the Glock from his pocket. The girl was 252 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,880 reading. Roby couldn't see what, but it 253 00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:05,360 was a paperback. She was intent on this, 254 00:09:05,360 --> 00:09:07,200 oblivious to all other things. That was 255 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:09,600 not good. Young people made easy targets 256 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:11,200 for predators. Young people were glued 257 00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:13,200 to their phone screens, thumbs ramming 258 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:15,600 keys, firing off messages of importance 259 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:17,600 like Facebook status, the color of their 260 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:19,839 underwear that day, girl problems, hair 261 00:09:19,839 --> 00:09:21,519 problems, sports stats, where the next 262 00:09:21,519 --> 00:09:24,240 party was. They also always had earbuds 263 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:26,240 on. With the music roaring, they could 264 00:09:26,240 --> 00:09:28,160 hear nothing until the lion struck. Then 265 00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:30,720 it was too late. Easy prey, and they 266 00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:32,959 didn't even know it. Roby lined up a 267 00:09:32,959 --> 00:09:34,800 shot between the seat cap. The other man 268 00:09:34,800 --> 00:09:36,720 leaned forward in his seat. They had 269 00:09:36,720 --> 00:09:38,320 been traveling for only a few minutes. 270 00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:39,839 They were passing through an even more 271 00:09:39,839 --> 00:09:42,080 derelic part of the city. There was no 272 00:09:42,080 --> 00:09:43,360 one sitting next to the girl in the 273 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:45,120 window seat. There was no one across the 274 00:09:45,120 --> 00:09:47,120 aisle from her. The closest person to 275 00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:48,480 her was an old woman who'd already 276 00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:50,800 fallen asleep. Most in the buses settled 277 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:52,480 down to sleep, though they'd barely gone 278 00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:55,279 half a mile yet. Roby knew how he would 279 00:09:55,279 --> 00:09:57,440 do it. Head and neck. Pull right, pull 280 00:09:57,440 --> 00:09:59,200 left. The same method the US Marines 281 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:01,440 teach. Because the target was a child. 282 00:10:01,440 --> 00:10:03,360 No weapon would be required, no loss of 283 00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:05,600 blood either. Most people died silently. 284 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:07,279 There was no melodramatic dying 285 00:10:07,279 --> 00:10:09,120 sequence. Folks just stopped breathing. 286 00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:11,920 Gurgle twitched and then went quietly. 287 00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:13,760 People close by were clueless, but then 288 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:15,839 most people were clueless. The man 289 00:10:15,839 --> 00:10:18,160 tensed. The girl shifted her book a bit, 290 00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:19,680 letting the wash from the overhead light 291 00:10:19,680 --> 00:10:22,079 hit the page more fully. Roby eased 292 00:10:22,079 --> 00:10:23,600 forward. He checked his gun. The 293 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:25,440 suppressor can was spun on as tight as 294 00:10:25,440 --> 00:10:27,600 it would go. But in the close confines 295 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:29,360 of the bus, there was no such thing as a 296 00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:31,360 silenced weapon. He would worry about 297 00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:33,760 explanations later. He had watched two 298 00:10:33,760 --> 00:10:35,440 people tonight lose their lives, one 299 00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:37,920 little boy. He did not intend to make it 300 00:10:37,920 --> 00:10:40,320 three. The man set his weight on the 301 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:42,240 balls of his feet. He lifted his hands, 302 00:10:42,240 --> 00:10:44,320 positioned them in a certain way. "Pull, 303 00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:46,560 pull," thought Roby. Head left, neck 304 00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:49,920 right, snap. Pull, pull. Dead girl. But 305 00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:53,440 not tonight. So, in that scene, Roi is 306 00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:56,959 not an assassin. He's a savior. Um, and 307 00:10:56,959 --> 00:10:59,519 you'll see in a subsequent chapter that 308 00:10:59,519 --> 00:11:01,200 uh Julie Getty, the young teenage girl, 309 00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:03,519 was not nearly as oblivious as Roby 310 00:11:03,519 --> 00:11:04,800 thought that she was. She actually when 311 00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:06,720 the guy tried to kill her, this pull 312 00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:09,040 pull is a marine way to kill somebody. 313 00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:11,040 Top of the head, lower part of the head, 314 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:12,399 upper part of the neck, you pull in 315 00:11:12,399 --> 00:11:13,680 different directions, snaps the neck 316 00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:15,600 cleanly. Works pretty much every time, 317 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:17,279 particularly the person is not expecting 318 00:11:17,279 --> 00:11:19,680 it. So Roby knows this is how the 319 00:11:19,680 --> 00:11:21,279 hitman, the other guy on the bus, is 320 00:11:21,279 --> 00:11:23,519 going to take Julie Getty out. and he's 321 00:11:23,519 --> 00:11:24,959 going to stop the guy just by shooting 322 00:11:24,959 --> 00:11:28,079 him down. And in that scene, it went 323 00:11:28,079 --> 00:11:29,519 from the outline. So really the bullet 324 00:11:29,519 --> 00:11:31,839 points I had were a bus later it's going 325 00:11:31,839 --> 00:11:33,519 to explode. That was a foreshadow or 326 00:11:33,519 --> 00:11:34,640 something that's going to happen later. 327 00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:36,800 Second hitman on the bus, Julie Getty 328 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:38,640 oblivious, but not really. You will have 329 00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:39,839 to find that out later as you keep 330 00:11:39,839 --> 00:11:42,399 reading. And Roy's way to take this guy 331 00:11:42,399 --> 00:11:44,399 out, but also Roy's instinct. This gives 332 00:11:44,399 --> 00:11:47,040 you a look right into the man's head of 333 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,480 how he notices things that other people 334 00:11:48,480 --> 00:11:50,560 don't notice. So, the six bullet points 335 00:11:50,560 --> 00:11:52,959 that I had in my outline translated to 336 00:11:52,959 --> 00:11:55,120 about two pages that I just read to you. 337 00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:56,560 Some of the bullet points were dead on. 338 00:11:56,560 --> 00:11:58,880 I included them in in um the section 339 00:11:58,880 --> 00:12:00,880 that I just read. Others are one that I 340 00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:02,320 was I was thinking about while I was 341 00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:03,440 writing it. So, there's always going to 342 00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:05,600 be more to it. There's not every bullet 343 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:08,000 point is going to be in there, but 344 00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:09,200 there's also going to be always going to 345 00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:10,880 be additional information that I did not 346 00:12:10,880 --> 00:12:12,639 lifted in the in the outline. That's the 347 00:12:12,639 --> 00:12:14,240 organic part of growing this. That's the 348 00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:15,760 organic part of being in the middle of a 349 00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:17,519 scene, the middle of a chapter. you're 350 00:12:17,519 --> 00:12:18,959 always going to add something to it 351 00:12:18,959 --> 00:12:20,160 because when you're in the moment, 352 00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:21,680 things just fly. Your inspiration, 353 00:12:21,680 --> 00:12:23,440 creativity is really rocking and rolling 354 00:12:23,440 --> 00:12:24,639 and you're going to add some additional 355 00:12:24,639 --> 00:12:26,160 things that's going to make it stronger. 356 00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:30,279 You'll see that to be the case 357 00:12:33,680 --> 00:12:35,120 when you write a screenplay. And I've 358 00:12:35,120 --> 00:12:37,200 written screenplays before. Directors 359 00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:38,639 will challenge you, you know, and the 360 00:12:38,639 --> 00:12:39,839 producers will read this stuff and 361 00:12:39,839 --> 00:12:41,200 they'll sit across from you and go, "Why 362 00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:42,800 is that scene in there? Why is this 363 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:44,000 person driving the narrative? Why is 364 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,040 that person saying this? How are you 365 00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:46,079 going to get out of that scene? What's 366 00:12:46,079 --> 00:12:47,279 the second purpose why the scene is 367 00:12:47,279 --> 00:12:48,480 anywhere? Because the scene is costing a 368 00:12:48,480 --> 00:12:50,240 lot of money for us to shoot. So, there 369 00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:51,680 can't just be one reason for the scene. 370 00:12:51,680 --> 00:12:52,880 It's got to be more than that. What is 371 00:12:52,880 --> 00:12:55,519 it? Ask yourself, why am I writing this 372 00:12:55,519 --> 00:12:57,519 chapter 12 just because it follows 373 00:12:57,519 --> 00:12:59,440 chapter 11 and it's the one before 374 00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:01,760 chapter 13? Uh, is it a bridge to 375 00:13:01,760 --> 00:13:03,200 something? Are you driving the plot 376 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:04,639 forward? Are you conveying information? 377 00:13:04,639 --> 00:13:06,399 Are you deepening a character in some 378 00:13:06,399 --> 00:13:09,680 way? Um, and I don't think those are the 379 00:13:09,680 --> 00:13:11,440 only three you could have, but those are 380 00:13:11,440 --> 00:13:14,240 three pretty important and critical and 381 00:13:14,240 --> 00:13:17,440 ubiquitous purposes in a novel. So ask 382 00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:19,120 yourself, what's the purpose and what is 383 00:13:19,120 --> 00:13:20,560 it, you know, and how am I going to 384 00:13:20,560 --> 00:13:23,040 convey that in the novel? And the the 385 00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:24,959 section I just I read to you, I conveyed 386 00:13:24,959 --> 00:13:26,320 a lot of information. I told you a lot 387 00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:28,399 about Roy's observations and how he does 388 00:13:28,399 --> 00:13:30,639 what he does. I told you about they were 389 00:13:30,639 --> 00:13:32,800 on a bus going somewhere and now there's 390 00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:35,040 a 14-year-old girl in the mix and you 391 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:36,639 have no idea how this is going to hook 392 00:13:36,639 --> 00:13:38,160 up or play out with Roa, but you know 393 00:13:38,160 --> 00:13:40,639 she's going to be somehow important in 394 00:13:40,639 --> 00:13:42,240 that. So that's a lot that I that 395 00:13:42,240 --> 00:13:44,160 happened in a page and a half in this 396 00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:46,639 book. So always ask yourself what is the 397 00:13:46,639 --> 00:13:48,240 reason I'm writing this chapter right 398 00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:50,160 now in front of me? What is the purpose? 399 00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:52,240 What am I trying to convey? If you can't 400 00:13:52,240 --> 00:13:54,639 answer one of those three questions in a 401 00:13:54,639 --> 00:13:56,240 positive way, convey information and 402 00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:57,600 character development or moving the plot 403 00:13:57,600 --> 00:14:02,320 forward, then don't write the chapter.